How to be Popular

14 Oct

Yesterday morning bright and early, Audrey called.  It was a phone call in which she pleaded with me to come visit her right away.  Lest you assume I am such a charming witty person that friends call me before breakfast just to beg for my company, I will let you in on a secret: it was not a social call.

She had a bat flying in her very high-ceilinged living room.  She had come downstairs from bed to see it crawling on her fireplace screen.   Her voice was admirabley under control when I spoke to her.

So I called my husband for a supply list of necessary bat-removing items: net, heavy gloves, hooded sweatshirt, wide-mouthed quart canning jar with lid.  I also took K.  She wanted to come.  Really.

Audrey’s husband was on the scene when we arrived.  He had taped the fireplace over with a piece of black plastic.  Audrey was out the door, leaving.  She said it was an appointment.

K and I examined the fireplace by removing only part of the plastic.  I could hear the bat.  And then I could see the bat.  After lots of trial and error and discussion on our part, in the end the bat made it easy.  It fell between the fireplace and the metal flange enclosing the fireplace, crawled through the gas line hole and out a half-inch space in the front.  I met it with the open glass jar.

The bat was really active and quite small. We took it home to show the children.  It was eventually released and crawled away.  Perhaps it was confused?

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